If I Stay focuses on the out-of-body experience of Mia – a teenage girl (portrayed by the talented Chloë Grace Moretz) who has become comatose from a car accident and is fighting for her life. I have not read the book on which this film is based, but after watching the trailer I was hopeful that If I Stay might explore complex issues like mortality and the will to live. These issues were definitely explored in the film, especially as its inevitable conclusion drew closer.
However, I was surprised to discover that the bulk of the screen time was devoted to the complicated relationship between Mia and her boyfriend Adam. Their shared love of music is actually a point of contention between them, since Mia is a classical cellist and Adam is in a rock band. As they both approach adulthood, they come to realize that their lives might be headed in opposite directions. While this drama was an entertaining storyline by itself, it felt only marginally connected to the film’s central crisis – Mia’s struggle to survive.
If I Stay tells its story in a fairly unconventional manner. As Mia (or is it her soul?) watches her lifeless body and struggles to find the strength to wake up from her coma, she experiences various flashbacks to significant moments in her life. These moments are presumably meant to serve as encouragement for her to keep fighting to stay alive, but they are harshly contrasted with the grim realities of the present. The real conflict in the film is internal and is communicated via Mia’s narration as she relives all of the significant moments of her life. In the aftermath of the accident that killed her immediate family, Mia must decide whether she wishes to stay in a painful reality, or to go on to a better place.
As Christians we believe that a better place awaits us after this life is over. However, there are times when the amount of pain in this life may be almost too much to handle. In those times it might feel easier to cease caring about this life and instead focus entirely on life after death. Mia is faced with this same conflict and has to decide whether she prefers this life or the next one. That decision of which life is preferable is one with which Christians constantly wrestle. If we become too preoccupied with Heaven it can cause us to miss out on all of the wonderful things this life can offer.
In If I Stay, whether or not Mia ultimately finds the strength to wake up is beside the point. This film is trying to remind us that there is always something worth staying for. No matter how devastatingly grim things may appear, there is always something to look forward to – not the least of which is experiencing the love of others. Even though Mia’s immediate family would not be waiting for her if she wakes up, she still has plenty of people who want to love and help her.
While I was watching Mia decide if she would be able to stay and face a painful, uncertain future, I could not help but be reminded of recent events. The depression and suicide of Robin Williams has brought to the forefront of our public consciousness this issue which affects countless people daily. Depression is a condition which can make it incredibly hard to find hope in the midst of a grim situation. Individuals with depression may feel it is easier to give up rather than face an uncertain, bleak future.
I realize that each person struggling with depression is doing so under different circumstances. However, if you want to help someone living with depression, there is one simple thing you could do that can help them regardless of their specific situation – simply love them. You don’t even have to be a close friend or family member; sometimes the kindness of a stranger can completely transform someone’s day more profoundly than someone they know.
Mia was loved by her close friends and family, but she was also loved by a faithful nurse. This nurse had only met Mia when she first arrived in the ER and did not know her outside of the hospital, but this nurse was constantly whispering words of encouragement into Mia’s ears. To me, this nurse was the most Christlike representation of love in the film. She displayed an unconditional love towards Mia with no expectation of reciprocation, watching over her faithfully. In the end, love became the determining factor in Mia’s ability to fight for survival. Love is an infinitely powerful force. We should never underestimate its ability to change someone’s outlook on life. It just might give them something for which to live.
